Snips, Snails and Puppy Dog Tails.

This week in my Bible reading, I started in Exodus.  My goal for 2018 was to read the Bible in a year-- and I have fallen a bit behind-- like 30 days behind.  Exodus 2 starts out with the birth of Moses.  Moses owes his life to 5 amazingly brave women. Shiphrad and Puah defied Pharaoh and saved hundreds of male babies.  Moses' sister, Miriam, was clever in fetching Moses' own mother to nurse him.  Moses's mother passed on great faith to her three children.  Most surprising, Pharaoh's daughter had compassion and rescued Moses and raised him as her own child.  Growing up in Pharaoh’s court, Moses was a man on the fast track to success.  Then something bad happens and he was on the run, fleeing from Pharaoh’s order to have him put to death (Exodus 2:15). He escaped to Midian, married Zipporah, had a baby boy, and helped look after his father-in-law’s flocks (Exodus 2:21 – 22; 3:1). In the midst of Moses’ everyday work as a humble shepherd, the angel of the Lord appeared to him as a “flame of fire from the midst of a bush” (Exodus 3:2 ESV). Read what happens next:

“When the Lord saw Moses coming to take a closer look, God called to him from the middle of the bush, ‘Moses! Moses!’” (Exodus 3:4 NLT)  

I think this passage provides us with specific insight into how God intentionally intervened in Moses’ life and the ways he is speaking to me now. The way that God talked to Moses-- through the bush-- seems amazing.  Wouldn't that experience be so amazing?  But God is talking to me and YOU today!

1. God uses busy people. In the midst of the most chaotic times in our lives that God’s voice has the most powerful impact.  Moses had a lot going on (wife, baby, flocks, fleeing death) and then this bush shows up-- telling him to go back to Pharaoh and rescue the children of Israel.   Moses asked "who am I to go?" Later the word says Moses "wasn't eloquent in speech"  which meant- he stuttered.  I am sure he felt inadequate because of his speech and his sin.  God uses me in the times of crazy-  food for a funeral when I have a million things going on or helping for a friend when schedules are a mess-- and I often feel inadequate for his call. If he waited for me to have time, he would never use me.

2. God will surprise you. Moses didn’t go out into the wilderness that day expecting to hear from God.  Most days I wake up, get ready for work, and follow my routine.  In the midst of my routine I am interrupted.   I am defiantly surprised by God.  The way that God prepares our lives for the next call is astounding to me.  My life plans have been wrecked by God's plan.  Sometimes, I admit, I am annoyed at the interruption.   I would have never in a million years expected to have a child with special needs or mental illness.  God used my education and experience to prepare me for this mountain I am climbing now.  

3. It’s possible to miss God if you focus on the burning bush alone. Moses was amazed that the fire didn’t consume the bush. Had Moses focused on the way God was communicating, rather than what He was saying, he would have missed the message.  How many times have I missed the message because I was stuck on the fire?  I really think that is why it has taken so long to find out answers related to Jackson.  I mean with all my education and knowledge-- I was sure it was ADHD, grief, and unexpected changes that caused a year of hellish symptoms. Not to mention, I had all these professionals chiming in their knowledge.  Focusing on the bush would have changed the whole story of Moses's life. 

4. If you’re going to hear God, you’ve got to pull away from your routine. Scripture doesn’t record why Moses was in the wilderness that day, but it does imply that it was not a part of his regular “sheep rounds.” Like Moses, we have to rise above the noise level of everyday life to hear His still, small voice.  Rising above the noise means putting away my phone, the TV, and getting silent before him.  He finds a way to tell me throughout the day-- Amy, do this... Amy, do that... but it isn't until I am quiet that I can see those nudges have been ongoing.  

The bottom line is this: God didn’t speak to Moses until Moses paid attention.

Ok God!  I am paying attention!  What is the next step?  Can you please send the bush to tell me?

I have a boy who is a high energy, dirty, loud creature.  While he can be a handful at times, he is also the most loving, sweet, and affectionate creature. I especially treasure the times that he wants to be near me.  PANDAS created  horrible separation anxiety in the beginning of our journey.  Separation anxiety is exhausting-- he needed me to be right beside him and I had a million things I needed to do with both my hands or my lap- which he was frequently using.  We have overcome the most significant time of separation anxiety and I am thankful that I am not as needed.  Since the diagnosis, Jackson has completed a 10 day course of antibiotics and 3 days of steroids.  Wow, what a different child!  I actually felt a small amount of grief due to his personality changes.  I was kind of use to the snips and snails and puppy dog tail boy he was.  I am still unsettled about the next course of action.  Since the new meds have ended, some of the symptoms that were briefly gone have returned.  I am not 100% convinced that long-term antibiotics are the best choice.  I want Jackson to be happy and healthy.  On the antibiotics he was much easier to deal with, so that seems like the right choice-- but I still have a feeling in my heart that their is more to this journey than a pharmaceutical fix.  So far-- no burning bush to tell me the plan, so I am continuing to research and make changes for the better, taking time away to listen to God.